Only Some Parents Care to Parent Their Children

Neglect

You will be either honoured or dishonoured by what your children eventually turn out to be in life. Therefore, consciously prepare them ensuring that they are raised in stature and wisdom—in favour with God and in favour with men.
Dhanesh is a teenager with a strong character and a refined demeanour. Always considerate and thoughtful of others, this devout boy spared no effort to come to the aid of the needy. No wonder the boy has carved a special niche for himself in my heart. He came out with flying colours in his Standard X Board exams.
It was his 17th birthday and I went over to his house wish him in person. Of course I was quick to extend a note of congratulations to his parents for their exemplary upbringing of their child.

Over lunch, Ulahannan chettan’, Dhanesh’s father, revealed, “Father, it is Jeevan’s birthday, too, today. Obviously he was referring to Jeevan their neighbour and a classmate of Dhanesh. A pall of gloom suddenly fell over his face. And he sighed, saying, “Some parents foster the growth of their children, nurturing and strengthening them. But alas! Some others forget this divine task entrusted to them in marriage. Their children somehow grow up on their own, but the consequences are often disastrous.”

At 16, Jeevan had turned out to be a juvenile delinquent! The police nabbed him in a hooch deal—a non-bailable offence. The remark made by Ulahannan chettan is food for thought. Yes, some parents are negligent and irresponsible in relation to bringing up their wards who then grow up in accordance with the rules of nature.

In fact, there is no difference between the biological ages of Dhanesh and Jeevan. Both the boys have completed sixteen years of age and are going on seventeen irrespective of the fact that one is in school and the other in jail. Their birthdays also fall on the same day. No difference absolutely! Then what and where lies the difficulty? Saint Luke says, “And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature and in favour with God and men (2:52).” Well, God the incarnate Son grew both in body and in wisdom gaining favour with God the Father and with the people.

Two kinds of growth in two different zones, that is, growth in wisdom and growth in body/stature, winning the approval of both his Father and the people of this world!

This Excerpt is taken from the book  ‘The Gospel of Parenting’ by Father Jimmy Poochakkatt. For more information on the book, click here!

Advertisements

5 Practical Ingredients to bring Contentment in your Marriage

“Contentment is not a matter of entitlement in marriage. To have contentment, a couple has to work for it. Whether you make marriage a heaven or a hell is contingent upon you.”

1.)

count-your-blessings-button

Count you blessings and never take them for granted

2.)

share-with-your-partner

Be satisfied with what you have and share it with your partner 

3.)

christian-marriage-help

Stop feeling better or less than other couples 

4.)

marriage-is-a-partnership-business

Bring a new idea to the situation instead of harping on what’s wrong

5.)

Venting

Share amicably when you feel like venting about something 

This Except is taken from the book  ‘Recipe for a Happy Marriage’ by Sajith Cyriac. For more information about the book : Click Here! 

Children Need Your Presence

father-and-daughter-silhouette-494x329

“Only if we devote time to our children, speaking of important things with simplicity and concern, and finding healthy ways for them to spend their time, will we be able to shield them from harm. Vigilance is always necessary and neglect is never beneficial.”    -Pope Francis, Amoris Laetitia 

A very busy businessman had only one child, a six-year-old daughter. She was studying in a prestigious English medium school in the city. He left home early every morning and returned home late at night, mostly around midnight. It was all for his family that he worked without respite, earning quite a lot in the process. He wanted to provide his only daughter with every comfort within his reach. He bought her expensive dresses and even arranged for a car to transport her to school and bring her back. In addition her study room air-conditioned and arranged for a homemade midday meal to be served warm at lunch time in the school.

One day while he was on a journey and, sitting in his car, was checking the files to be presented at the meeting, his mobile rang. It was a call from the school where his daughter studied. The headmistress said straight away:

“Sir, you should come to the school today.”
“Not today,” He blurted out, somewhat irritated, “I am very busy.”
“It is to talk about your daughter,” said the headmistress.
“I shall send her mother. She can adjust her time and meet you,” he said
“I want to see her ‘Daddy”, not her ‘Mummy”, said the headmistress.
“I have an important meeting to attend, Ma’am. Please try and understand.”
“What is more important for you, Sir- your business or your daughter?”
Suddenly realizing that having run out of excuses he could not protest anymore, “Well yes, I’ll come.” And boy! Was he glad he did go promptly, setting aside all his work and busyness. When he met the headmistress in the office she straight away said to him, “Yesterday the school held a drawing competition for all its students. The topic was “My family”. Then, pointing to his daughters drawing the headmistress said to him, “In your daughters sketch of the family, all, including her grandfather, grandmother, pet cat and pet dog, the table and the chair, the computer and the TV set are all there, but you, the father, are not indicated anywhere”. Then, as his eyes began to well with tears, the headmistress called in his daughter and said to her, “Dear, your daddy is not to be seen in this picture you’ve so nicely sketched yesterday-how come?”

Pat came her reply, “I usually don’t see my daddy, nor do I talk to him, he is always busy. Mummy says, Daddy came and then went.”  -Malyalam Weekly, November 2004

“Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush, anxious for greater development, greater riches and so on, so that children have very little time for their parents. Parents have very little time for each other, and in the home begins the disruption of the peace of the world.” – Mother Teresea

This Excerpt was taken from the book ‘The Gospel of Parenting : The What, The Why & The How of Christian Parenting’. For more information about the book: Click Here!

 

WHAT IS THIS THING CALLED LOVE?

what_is_love
Some years ago a popular singer sang a song, “There’s no thing such as love”. Was she right? Some may be tempted to say so. There is so much unkindness, so much deception, cruelty even among those who claim to love each other , also among religious people who claim to love God. It all depends, doesn’t it, on your definition of love. It also depends a lot on your personal, subjective view of love.

Shirley Bassey or the person who composed this song had probably just then been drastically jilted. On the other Jim Reeves, most of whose songs are sad because of his unhappy separation from his wife, never forgot the true meaning of love. It shines through the words, even of his sad songs and especially of his religious songs.

But what is this thing called love? We might well begin by mentioning some of the things which seem like love and and  are often called love but are really not love. Friendship, infatuation and lust. In each of these there is an attraction between two people but though infatuation may lead to love and friendship, neither of these and certainly not lust can be identified with love. For love is essentially selfless and each of the above contains elements of selfishness…. Lust of course is entirely selfish. The friendship between a boy and a girl that normally leads to marriage implies a very strong mutual attraction.

Marriage is a complete and exclusive union of two whole persons—soul, mind, feelings,
affections, and body. Necessarily there will also be pleasure not only in the consummation of this union but even in everything that leads up to it. But if this pleasure on the part of either or both is selfish, in so far as it is selfish, it is not love. And the more selfish it is the less chance there is of the permanence of their union and the success of their marriage.

Love again must be distinguished from emotions. These, especially with young people are associated with love and often but incorrectly identified with it. But emotions are passing things; sometimes they pass very rapidly. I remember when I was going to England on board ship as a young lad,  there was another boy with me who seemed to find a `flame’ every night. When we got to Aden, he bought the largest box of chocolates he could find for his latest ‘flame’ but by evening when he was to present it, happily for us, other three in the group, he had lost interest in her and at night we bought a bottle of champagne to celebrate his freedom and enjoyed the box of chocolates.

I have said and will have to say it again that love is giving, but it is certainly not merely giving and certainly not just giving things. A gift given in an ungracious way is better not given at all. Love begins when we give something of ourselves.

This Excerpt is taken from the book ‘So you want to get married’ by R.H. Lesser. For more information: Click Me 🙂

Amoris Laetitia, the New Apostolic Exhortation of Pope Francis.

Amoris-Laetitia

Much of the “Amoris Laetitia” consists on the reflections of the Gospels and church teaching on love, the family and children.

It begins with an opening chapter inspired by the Scriptures, to set a proper tone. Thereafter, the Holy Father examines the actual situation of families, and recalls some essential aspects of the Church’s teaching on marriage and the family, thus paving the way for two central chapters dedicated to love.

Further on the Pope highlights some pastoral approaches that can guide us in building sound and fruitful homes in accordance with God’s plan, with a full chapter dedicated to raising of children.

Finally, he offers an invitation to mercy and pastoral discernment of those situations that fall short of what the Lord demands of us, and conclude with a brief discussion of family spirituality.

The copy of this book will be available 15th April. Send your orders to st.paulsmarketing@gmail.com or bybbangalore@gmail.com